I write this in September 2020, the year that the UK was hit by the worldwide Coronavirus Pandemic. Table Tennis was hit more than most sports, being mainly an indoor game. But we are playing again so I don’t want to dwell on that. Rather, I want to focus on the 2019-20 season.
First, however, a bit of local Cleethorpes\Grimsby Area history. As I have often said, in 2009-10 my team (then) NALGO F won the old Division 2 (since renamed Division 1) by winning all 16 of our matches. Sean Ward and Jack Blyth, then “kids” (if they don’t mind me saying) led the way and I pulled my socks up a bit. Or rather, they pulled me along to better things. Incidentally, there was no fist pumping or gamesmanship or crying or cheating from us. We set out to avoid relegation then coolly built up steam. This here moron maybe used an Oxymoron there with “coolly” and “steam” by the way.
Before long we expected to win so doing so was “Just another day at the office”. Sean and Jack remain great role models of course…Successful too. Extremely.
But at the end of that golden season we went our separate ways. I ended up joining a “Pipefit” team in Division 3. Sadly their bright and cheerful Welshman Eric Williams – a picture of health and vitality – suddenly passed away, so I took his place. That wonderfully sporting gentleman Brian Lomas became “Mon Kapitan”. What a phlegmatic philosopher! Organised us so well too. I’d like to think we didn’t let him down too often.
In 2011, when new team-names were the rage, I came up with the team-name Nemesis. I am an unapologetic Trekkie of course. Other teams chose to call themselves “The Old Swingers” (later “The Untouchables”), “The Has Beens”, “Cudabins”, “Greenhorns” and God knows what. And of course a group of young kids titled themselves the “Centurions”! Young Jack Blyth played for “Swingers\Untouchables” without even knowing what those names were about.
Anyway, lobber Dennis Burgoyne teamed up with Brian and myself under the Nemesis name. Then Phil Sharpe provided our defensive spine in 2014\15. Dennis left in 2015. We went on to win The Cup (Handicap) and the “new” Second Division by 8 points. Then we finished bottom of Division One after keeping above that “wooden spoon” spot most of the season. Wolds Wanderers made a late surge to skip over us while Phil was on holiday abroad (towards the end anyway). Finishing bottom didn’t mean we were crap.
Last August (2019), however, I managed to persuade seven year absentee Craig Kendall to make a big comeback and then join us. He has pedigree, having won some Men’s Doubles Titles for example. At first he was very rusty, as expected, but some great shots were still there. As many surly opponents later remarked, those winners rang out all over the place. Haha.
So it became another season at the office for my team in the “newer” (third tier) Division Two. Craig took 100%, Phil 85% (2nd best average in this division) and I was disappointed to finally drop down to 67% by losing all three to Colin Woodford’s team at the end. Colin’s lot always beat me straight after I’ve won something!!! Kapitan Brian weighed in with a decent 53%.
Sadly Coronavirus Lockdown cut the season short with two matches left to play. The league was frozen and we were declared Champions. Played 19 Won 19. I was hoping to put my Average right but… Tough at the top lol.
Orsted A (Colin W, Charlotte “Rampling” Ashford and Derek Elmhirst) and Zebras Mark 3 (Dave Mitchell, Sam Saywell, Bill Bygott) also had great seasons, each of them only losing 4 matches all season. We of course inflicted 3 of those on both teams. Meanwhile Immingham Club A (Dave Hall, Millie Smith and the Dimblebys) won 17\18 in Division Three. Stuart Pollard (Greenhorns) scuppered them by taking all 3 and thus helping force a draw.
4Matic Engineering (featuring youngsters Luke Nimmo and Isaac Gibney) finished top of the pile in The Prem of course. They were unbeaten in open play. Nudge-nudge. And “Team of Many Names” Woodfield WM (Chloe Lingard, Jack Chambers, Colin Grey, Simon Burniston) went unbeaten to take the D1 Title. I’d better mention that our Craig Reserved for both 4Matic and Woodfield WM. He is very choosy who he plays for.
Lots of stats and names here I see. Not my thing to be honest. Let’s not forget all the great table tennis being played throughout the league. I feel sure the game has progressed overall. As new Chairman John Hancock remarked, there was an awful lot of defensive play around here in the past. Good defenders are thin on the ground these days, whilst fast-bat attackers are flourishing. Sean Ward is still top of the shop now, closely followed by John Hancock. Jack Blyth is up there too. John says he was more defensive early on, but I don’t recall that. Attack is the way now.
Must mention, sadly, that Brian Lomas has found the inactivity of Covid Lockdown rather debilitating, if I may say so. He is unsure about what level he can play at so is seeking a team in D2. Craig is our new captain. Must say that Brian will be a very hard act to follow. The man is a legend, as I hinted at earlier. Brian will be greatly missed, but I hope he does well, wherever he goes. On a brighter note…
Congratulations to our Craig for being at least one of the youngest Vice Chairmen we have ever had, following the recent AGM. His work as Media Officer is outstanding too. By comparison this blog is “Dinosaur Times”, written on papyrus with a quill. Craig’s young son might be impressed though: he loves Dinosaurs!
And with that thought I bid you all Adieu.
Paul Butters
© PB 7\9\2020.
